A Confederacy of Hot Dogs

Phil LoPresti hates everything except his girlfriend Missy, the band Swans, and Clive Barker (except for the film Nightbreed—he hates that film most of all). He channels his misanthropy into his poetry and art photography, but feels even more discouraged when no one buys his brilliant art. He shares his disgust by writing angry ALL CAPS posts on Facebook attacking all the mediocre writers on his 'friends' list. Needing money to get Missy off his back, Phil enters an art & photography contest. He visits a cancer ward for inspiration and steals ‘artistic materials.’ Phil creates what he feels is his ultimate masterpiece. Unfortunately, an elderly woman drops dead upon first glance at Phil’s ‘artwork.’ Her grieving family sues him. Desperate for money, he stumbles upon a mafia money-laundering job selling hot dogs, but that is only the beginning of his problems. Faced with jail time and losing the love of his life, Phil embarks upon a madcap journey through Jersey in this laugh-out-loud irreverent romp into the dark side of art and love.Praise for Christoph Paul'Brave in its playfulness, A Confederacy of Hot Dogs brings Bukowski to Bizarro for the Facebook generation. As with the best satire, Christoph Paul’s hilarious no-holds-barred novella has a lot of love for what it mocks. The most genuinely fun book I’ve read in many years.'— Alexander Boldizar, author of The Ugly“Christoph Paul might be our generation's patron saint of crass. Charming, funny, and perverse, A Confederacy of Hot Dogs will have you pissing yourself and feeling warm fuzzies in equal measure. Read it, and set it down, and whisper to yourself, 'I love you, YOU F&#K.'—  Brian Allen Carr, author of Sip and Short Bus'A hilarious and transgressive love letter to A Confederacy of Dunces and struggling artists in the digital age.'—  Jayme Karales, author of Disorderly and creator of LowRes Wunderbred